EPHESIANS 4:17-32 “HOW TO BE A BODY BUILDER” Mark Kolbe

INTRODUCTION

As you know you can use the internet to learn just about anything today and that includes what it takes to become a body builder. If it is your desire to have big, thick, chiseled muscles all over your body, a simple google search on the topic will come back with tips like this: 1. Master Proper Form First, 2. Take a Day Off Between Workouts, 3. Make Sure You Stretch, 4. Have a Goal, 5. Eat plenty of protein and carbohydrates before and after a workout, 6. Include workouts that focus on cardiovascular health, 7. Stay Focused and In Control, 8. Perform exercises that require you to use multiple muscle groups, 9. Learn from Your Mistakes. 10. And as you would expect, the really serious body builders need to have very strict diets that they must religiously.

We have spent the last 2-3 weeks learning about how the Christians are part of a body. We have learned that it’s not enough to just be a part of the body, but instead each part needs to contribute to the body in a positive way, not doing it harm. When we get to Ephesians 4:17, it seems that Paul has some inside scoop regarding the behavior of the Christians in Ephesus. Certain parts of this body aren’t functioning as they should, so Paul has to get more personal with his audience and tell them how to improve.

Paul is going to do this by insisting that these Gentile Christians in Ephesus must live differently from the Gentiles in Ephesus who do not believe in Jesus. We are going to see that this is not just a difference, but a noticeable difference. If you think about examples of ways people try to be noticed, most tend to relate to external looks, special talents, pride, or devious behavior. However, as we’ll see, Paul doesn’t instruct these Christians to wear fancy suits or dresses, he doesn’t tell them to show off juggling skills on a street corner, to move out of their houses into communes, or to sing loud worship songs as they march to every church service they can find. Instead, the different and noticeable lifestyle Paul is talking about has to do with changed hearts and minds.

NON-CHRISTIANS LOSE SENSITIVY TO GAIN SENSUALITY

17 So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. 18 They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. 19 Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed.

First, Paul contrasts the way these believers should be thinking and acting by contrasting it with the futile thinking of non-believers. The Greek word for futile in this passage is mátaios (Mat-i-yose), which means devoid of truth, or perverse. When people are perverse, they have a goal or desire to obtain something, but they disregard truth in their attempts to obtain it. Their ideas and desires run contrary to God’s standard – His character, His words, and His work. That makes their behaviors futile attempts to obtain what they really need.

Paul then focuses on the hearts of people in verse 18, when he writes about hearts being hardened. He doesn’t say it here, but in other places in scripture it says that God sometimes plays a role in the hardening of a person’s heart. It’s important to understand that the hardening of a person’s heart isn’t a matter of God toying with the consciences of innocent people. People are already guilty of sin prior to hearts becoming hardened. They have begun a cumulative process of allowing their consciences to be desensitized to the holiness of God. God has provided evidence and information to them in various forms that proves their choices and beliefs contradict His truth, but they continually ignore those facts. Since people like this are willing to be fooled, God gives them what they want (Romans 1:18-24, 1 Timothy 4:1-2). Once a person has lived like this long enough, it is very tough for them to respond to God’s call and repent of their sin.

Their inability to see things from God’s perspective is also noted in the phrase, “They are darkened in their understanding”. These words about their spiritual condition imply a lifestyle like what it is for someone who has been physically blind from birth. A person like that cannot even comprehend what it means to see.

When Paul says to “no longer live like the Gentiles do”, he is referring to people who have ungodly, inexplicable, non-sensical beliefs and lifestyles due to minds lacking truth of God and hearts unable to repent. We can find all sorts of examples of this today, where people are rebelling against obvious things that God has designed in creation and what he has revealed in scripture. People who are determined to create a new, false reality based upon a perverse mindset. The recent shift in beliefs regarding sexuality and gender are two of the most obvious examples of this today. In the future, this kind of irrational thinking will come to a head when people seriously believe they can defeat Jesus Christ during the tribulation.

In verse 19, Paul reveals what happens when people’s minds and hearts are no longer sensitive to God. From a physical perspective, many of us know what it is like to lose sensitivity. Some of us have experienced the loss of smell or taste due to illness. Before my wife got surgery, she had begun to lose feeling in her feet because her nerves were being impinged in her lower back area. But I think an example of someone who has lost sensitivity, that is a better example for what Paul is talking about is a person who we might call a slob. Have you ever been to someone’s house or apartment who has slobby tendencies? I’m not talking about people whose house is in disrepair because they don’t have the money to fix broken things, but someone who leaves garbage and food laying around; someone who dislikes doing dishes, so they leave stacks of them by the sink, or on the end table. Some people become contented living that way because they put more value on doing other things like watching TV, browsing the internet, or having parties than they do cleanliness.

Paul isn’t referring to people who are oblivious to a moldy cheese sandwich on a bedside table, he is talking about people who lack spiritual sensitivity. They have lost sensitivity to the things of God and the evidence He has provided. They now are numb to it. However, they are still sensitive to something because Paul says they have “given themselves over to sensuality”. Instead of allowing their spiritual senses to be stimulated, they attempt to stimulate senses that are affected when they behave in ways that go against the character and will of God. They live lives of indulgence – attempting to get whatever they want no matter the cost, only seeing what is right before their eyes. The earth and what it offers are so appealing, they don’t bother to think about long-term consequences.

CHRISTIANS NEED TO WEAR NEW MINDS & HEARTS THAT DISPLAY GOD’S CHARACTER

20 That, however, is not the way of life you learned 21 when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. 22 You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; 23 to be made new in the attitude of your minds; 24 and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Paul now contrasts the life philosophy of non-believers, with a different way of living that these Gentile Christians had already been taught sometime in the past. Remember, Paul is writing to these people from Rome, which occurred after he had lived with many of these people in Ephesus during his 2^nd and 3^rd missionary journeys (Timothy will be sent to become a leader later). While in Ephesus he had spent time teaching them personally (Acts 18:23) and talking about Christianity in public lecture halls (Acts 19:9). Upon leaving these people in Ephesus, these young Ephesian Christians had continued to receive instruction from disciples that Paul left behind. For example, Aquilla and Priscilla established a church in their home in Ephesus (1 Corinthians 16:19). These two taught Apollos, and then Apollos eventually taught there are well (Acts 18:24-28).

In other words, these people Paul is writing to had already received encouragement from himself, as well as other brothers and sisters, to not follow their old nature. Now Paul finds it necessary to remind them again how they should be living as Christians. How come? Were these people just slow learners?

The concept of learning is a curious thing. Some things that we learn, we never have to be taught again. For example, once you learn 2 + 2 is 4, you would never intentionally list the answer as 5. Once a person learns that fire causes painful burns, it isn’t likely he’ll stick his face on an open flame to see if it happens every time. Then there are other things where learning occurs time as we fail on our first few attempts to learn them. The process we went through to learn how to ride a bike is an example. When we fell, we brushed off the dirt, gravel, and tears, then got back on the bike to try again. Sometimes learning takes a long time because we are suspicious and don’t immediately or consistently follow the teaching because we are holding out hope that what we learned isn’t entirely true, or that there is an alternative that produces pleasurable results as well. Mentally, people who smoke cigarettes know that their health will suffer for it, but they gain enough “value” from them that they continue to smoke anyway.

Paul instructs these Christians to take action and put off the “Gentile way of life”. This proves that when they became believers the tendency to sin wasn’t fully removed. Their “old nature” filled with deceitful desires still existed and therefore they were able to be tempted, and then to give in to that temptation. Paul is teaching these people to unlearn one kind of way of life and learn how to live a different way. Or said another way, quit dressing like non-believers and put on the uniform and dress code of Christ.

All Christians struggle with the tendency to want to continue living according to the ways of this “old self”. Even Paul wasn’t transformed into a perfect individual after having been taught by Christ. He admitted to the struggles he had when he wrote Romans 7:15-20 - I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

Being a Christian is a constant learning process. Paul’s use of the phrase “be made new in the attitude of your mind” means that he wants these people to come into the process with hearts that are willing to change, get rid of the thinking that goes in their mind that is unholy, intentionally think about how to being holy, and then do it.

SPECIFIC BEHAVIORS THAT ARE ESPECIALLY BAD FOR CHRISTIANS

25 Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need. 29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

At the beginning of this section, Paul referred to extreme, perverse, ungodly thinking and behavior that exists in the lives of those who lived around Ephesus who were not believers in Jesus. But now, Paul writes about specific issues that these Gentile Christians need to deal with. Paul addresses four specific behaviors they need to intentionally get rid of: Falsehood, uncontrolled anger, stealing, and unwholesome talk.

The text doesn’t tell us why Paul focused on these things - all we know is that he did. It is likely that someone who held a leadership role in Ephesus has either written to Paul or travelled to Rome to tell him personally that these things were a problem in the Ephesian church. There are lots of ways people can sin, so it makes us wonder why Paul was compelled to address these particular issues with the Ephesians. It’s worth noting that these people don’t immediately correct these behaviors, because when Paul writes to Timothy, the church leader in Ephesus several years later, he encourages him to address many of these same issues.

Just like people have different personalities and abilities, they also have different behavioral weaknesses. It’s possible that these were characteristics that many of these believers happened to share more than others. It’s also possible these behaviors were more prominent because of where they lived and who they were living among. Sometimes when people see certain behavior modeled enough times, they think it is “normal” or “acceptable”.

Ephesus was a large, multi-ethnic center of trade. As a result, there were a lot of wealthy people, living in extravagance, comfort, and pleasure. When circumstances occur that threaten one’s lifestyle, people can become mean and cruel to each other. It’s also possible that they were tempted towards these sins because of conflicts that existed between Gentile Christians and Jewish Christians.

We’ll talk a little bit more about what these sins seem to be rooted in later. But for now, let’s focus on the two primary reasons why he insists these people clean up their act. Paul has already referred to the way non-believing people in that city live. Therefore, what better way for those people to see the life-changing potential of Jesus Christ, than to see another group of people start acting differently than they did before? That’s the first reason he wants these Christians to change. Picture a society where everyone is chasing after pleasure, when they don’t get what they want, they get nasty with each other. Even when they do get what they want, they experience bad consequences. However, amid that type of culture, there is a subset of people who, even though bad things happen, remain joyful, nice, and serve others. Those people will shine like a light in the darkness. People who see that different and refreshing behavior may then ask the question, “What is it that they have that enables them to live like that, and how can I get it?”

The second reason Paul insists these people get rid of these issues is because of the topic that he has been writing about previously – unity. If these people are going to be a good witness to non-believers around them, and if they are going to be able to withstand the persecution that is going to come from outside their ranks, this body of believers needs to get along and be united in one purpose. All these behaviors were detrimental towards the process of building up a group of people.

Let’s look at the 4 issues that Paul highlights.

Falsehood. Why is falsehood bad? When a person does not speak the truth, others around them can suffer for it. This behavior can have a compound effect because if someone believes the lie is the truth, they will also spread that same lie. This is especially true when someone lies about things revealed by God. That kind of falsehood leads to spiritual carnage. Lies lead people to live the opposite of how God has intended, and bad things will always result. Falsehood and lies are eventually discovered. Therefore, once you realize someone hasn’t been truthful with you in the past, it becomes difficult to trust them in the future. I’ve been guilty of falsehood. More than once, my wife has caught me merely rinsing a dish I just used with water then putting it on the side of the sink where the clean dishes are supposed to go. That kind of behavior is a falsehood - dishes are supposed to be washed with soap and a washcloth if you really want them clean. Because of what I’ve done in the past, every time I step up to the sink, I see a bit of skepticism in her eyes, and receive instructions from her on how to wash dishes.

Anger – The Bible acknowledges the fact we are emotional beings. Even Jesus experienced and displayed emotion. He wept upon hearing of the death of Lazarus and got angry upon seeing the degrading way people were treating the temple. Anger is a natural response to bad things. However, Paul reminds these people to get over anger quickly. Christians should not focus on bad things for too long. Just like this world is temporary, so should our anger be. Harboring anger leads to resentment and makes people more likely behave in an irrational or embarrassing way. People tend to avoid angry people, so anger also leads to a lack of deep, meaningful relationships. Unchecked anger is a key reason for disunity.

Stealing. Of the 4 things Paul focuses on, stealing seems most egregious. It seems unconscionable that a believer in Christ would take possessions that didn’t belong to him or her. Paul doesn’t provide any details on what was being stolen, why it was being stolen, or whom it was stolen from. It’s possible that since Ephesus was a wealthy city, some of these believers justified their actions by thinking they were just taking from the surplus of others, or maybe some stole out of revenge for the persecution they were facing. However, Paul’s additional commentary about the matter leads me to believe the stealing was occurring within the church. Paul refers to the necessity of work and to earn enough so that an individual can give to someone else in need. Believers in Ephesus had likely come together as a group and were sharing resources like food, clothes, housing, and money. In an environment with a pool of resources, some of them may have taken advantage of the situation. Rather than working to earn enough to contribute to the greater good, some people may have become lazy, and taking food, money, clothes that were meant for others who were unable to work and had real needs.

Unwholesome words. The Greek word here is “sapros” (sa-prahs) which means words that are rotten, corrupt, or bad. Upon first glance this might seem kind of vague, or even debatable because each person has a different opinion of what wholesome or unwholesome is. However, we can get a better perspective of what kind of words fall into the category of unwholesome by considering how the word is used throughout scripture. Six out of eight times this word is used in the New Testament it is used in the context of a tree and its fruit. Wholesome talk is like a healthy tree that produces good fruit. Unwholesome talk is like an unhealthy tree that produces fruit that cannot be eaten.

Obviously, not every word we say directs people towards a better relationship with Christ. For example, if I told you I was bringing chocolate cake with peanut butter frosting to the church potluck, that has no spiritual impact whatsoever. On the other hand, if your reply to me was, “Please, don’t bring that dessert again. The last time you brought it, it tasted like you made it with dog do do”, those words start to lean towards the unwholesome side of the pendulum.

The phrase, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me” is a lie. People are influenced by words. Words filled with truth and love are good because they reflect the nature of God. Words filled with falsehood or hate are bad because they do not reflect the nature of God. Christianity is built on the concept of being vulnerable, then hearing words that give an honest assessment that there is something wrong with you, and hearing words that provide the solution to the problem, thus bringing a person closer to God. Christians should not speak in a way that encourages a person towards sin.

CONSIDER THE HOLY SPIRIT, THE FUTURE, JESUS AND FELLOW BELIEVERS

30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Just to make sure these Ephesian Christians were clear about the kind of behavior they needed to get rid of, Paul summarizes it using some different words than he did before. However, they all fall into the same categories that he described previously (v31).

Finally, after having written numerous verses on what NOT to do, this chapter ends with one verse describing what the way these Christians should be acting instead. In chapter 5 we’ll see additional encouragement from Paul on the type of characteristics that their lives should display. However, at the end of this chapter he reminds them that they should be mimicking the attitude and behavior of their savior, Jesus Christ.

Earlier I mentioned that I wanted to talk about what these negative behaviors were rooted in. You may have already been trying to figure that out as you considered what falsehood, uncontrolled anger, stealing, and unwholesome talk have in common. Verse 31 also gives us a clue as to what leads people to act in the ways that these Ephesian Christians did.

Paul refers to the fact that these people were “sealed for the day of redemption”. That day is some time in the future when Christians will all be resurrected from the dead, being changed in an instant as they receive their new, glorified, bodies that are not subject to death or sin. Paul is contrasting what will be someday with the way things are now. Christians living in this world will be subjected to bad circumstances that they have to deal with.

The Bible says that God has set eternity in the heart of man. This means that everything we experience in this imperfect world gets bounced off the perfect and eternal world that God has made available to those He created. Some things that we experience are a minute reflection of the good that awaits in heaven. Things like a beautiful sunset, a babbling brook, the taste of good food, or the laughter of a child are like the tip of a happiness iceberg for which we were made. On the other hand, when bad things happen, we experience opposition to the good that we long for and the good that awaits in heaven.

All four of the things Paul described are sinful ways people respond to things in this world that they do not like. The people who are more apt to respond with these attitudes and behaviors are those who are more focused on themselves, and the here and now, than they are on other people and preparing for heaven.

Not only are other people negatively affected by these behaviors, but so is God, and He’s affected in a deep and personal way. Earlier Paul talked about the Gentiles who had lost sensitivity in spiritual truth. When a person becomes a believer in Jesus, they discover a new kind of sensitivity in their life, because the Holy Spirit takes up residence inside. It is the role of the Holy Spirit to tweak the consciences of believers and convict them so that their attitudes and behaviors come into alignment with Jesus. Verse 30 lets us know that the Holy Spirit is deeply sensitive to how we respond to the work He is doing in us. In other words, this sensitivity runs two ways.

Anyone who has gotten married is familiar with this two-way sensitivity dynamic. A person who is single can eat what they want, when they want, and could clean up afterwards when and if they want. A single person can choose whatever paint color they want for the wall, and whatever kind of bed spread they want. But once a person is married, they find themselves living with someone else who is sensitive to all their choices and behaviors. Married people learn that their spouses want to take their thoughts and feelings into consideration.

The Holy Spirit’s sealing provides the security of a guaranteed salvation and therefore a future of perfection and abundance. The behaviors the Ephesian Christians were displaying didn’t reflect that reality. They were the reflection of a people who were still primarily focused on receiving pleasure in an imperfect world.

SO WHAT

1. Enjoy the good things in life but don’t make them your main goal.

A Christian should ask himself this question, “What is the primary thing that determines my affections, my thinking, and my actions? Is it comfort, pleasure, greed, or is it future, eternal reward? The music duo of Seals and Crofts was famous for a song, “We may never pass this way again”. It is based upon the reality that life is short, so we need to take advantage of it. For some the pursuit of earthly pleasures becomes the primary goal even if it requires immoral behaviors to accomplish it. As Christians we shouldn’t sacrifice holiness and reward just to experience something now that can never live up to what God is going to let us experience in heaven. Jesus commanded us to seek first His kingdom (Matthew 6:33). Paul encouraged Christians to set their minds on things above (Colossians 3:2). Solomon said it this way in Ecclesiastes: “You who are young, be happy while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see, but know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment (Ecclesiastes 11:9-10).” “…here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind.14 For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil (Ecclesiastes 12:13-14)”

2. Seek and Speak Truth

Today, falsehoods are so prevalent, easy to spread, and intentionally being used to manipulate people. So much so, that it has given rise to a group of people called “Fact Checkers”. When truth is so relative, can you even trust a fact checker? It is very difficult to ensure that we and the people we love are being taught the truth. According to God’s plan, nuclear families are one of the key ways to ensure that truth is taught and learned. However, today parents have less influence over their children than ever. Instead the role of dictating what is true and what is good is being taken over by school boards, school teachers, government, journalists, and the internet. Even adults need to be careful who and what they are listening to. Christians need to surround themselves with others who treasure absolute truth, grounded in who God really is and what He is really like. Not only should we hold on to unchanging truth we have been taught in the past, but we need to continue to learn by studying the Bible. When I graduated from high school, I received a bible as a gift from the church I attended. My youth director at the time wrote in it, “Either this book will keep you from sin, or sin will keep you from this book.”

3. Listen to your conscience and respond in a Godly way.

In the world today, the bar of moral excellence has pretty much been lowered to the ground. Personal accountability is becoming rare and letting law breakers loose on the streets is becoming virtuous. In many places, chaos reigns and people wonder why. For Christians, not only do we have God’s truth in front of us in creation and in the Bible, but we have the Holy Spirit inside us, playing an active role in convicting us when we sin. During those times that you feel far from God, honestly reflect to see if it has anything to do with the fact you have ignored or grieved the Holy Spirit. If you know it’s wrong, but do it anyway, that leads to a hard heart. Instead, we need to have soft and vulnerable ones by responding in a Godly way whenever the Holy Spirit tweaks our consciences.

4. Display Godly character in all circumstances

Do it when with non-believers so they can see Jesus. Do it when with believers so they can be built up.